Follow Through Girl Rides Again

The past year has not been an easy one. I feel trapped in a job I should have had 15years ago. The alarm clock I use daily is older than the majority of my co-workers. I live in town that seems impossible to make new friends in. My best friend has long forgotten I exist - recently married it's understandable. I lost my baby girl kitty two days before Thanksgiving. Sob, sob, sob.

Just when I started to believe I should pull the covers up over my head and refuse to get out bed save a snack here and there and maybe, just maybe an occasional shower, I received a call from an old friend. "I want to do the Seattle Rock n Roll half marathon and I immediately thought of you." So there it is. The one good thing 2010 gave me. A real change. No longer am I the girl you call when you need a doughnut fix or some ice cream mixed together with pieces of candy bar. I've become the girl you call when you want someone to run races with. Hurrah!

The chips are tucked neatly back into the cupboard. The crisper is full of life-giving vegetables. The sweet tooth, who by they way is putting up a fierce fight, is on it's way out the door. It's time to fuel the body, focus the mind and put the running shoes back on until I can't run anymore.

I'm baaaaack!

Let Me Introduce Myself

Something amazing happens when you push yourself further than once ever imaginable. Something magic in feeling pain like none other and finding the strength still move onward. To run toward the finish line in agony and be bathed in glory as you cross.

With the finish of the Half I feel I can safely say I have become a Follow Through Girl. I have conjured an idea and I have seen it to the end. An idea so immense and so shrouded by doubt it would have never materialized in the past.

It started with tying my shoes, heading out the door and putting one foot in front of the other. Taking the long route. Walking in the rain. Looking at myself in complete honesty. Discovering my truth along the way.

Just four months of 33 years has changed me. Today I am strong. Today I am confident. Today I am joyful. Today I am AMAZING. Today I have become a Follow Through Girl.

Finally Following Through!

A lot has happened in the months passing since my last post. I've taken some personal blows. Usually these would send me spinning backward to the idea girl. Bag of white cheddar popcorn in one hand, a little Ben and Jerry's in the other. Sitting around thinking of all the things I'd like to do. All the people I'd like to become more like.

Who I am today so far differs from that girl. I don't even recongize who I see in the mirror each day. But I do like her. She's focused, driven, full of promise. She's worth taking care of.

Tomorrow evening I'm headed North, to the big race! The first half marathon had to be put off due to lack of funds. I stayed on track and just a few weeks delayed I'll be completeing the 2010 Kirland Mother's Day Half Marathon! (And this one's got hills!)

I don't imagine I'll have many more entries. I've found I don't have a lot of time these days. Work, training, sleep, work and train some more but I'll be back Monday to let you all know I survived it!

Day 48: All About Day 47

It's true what they say about taking care of yourself. When you do, good things will happen for you. I started this journey of Becoming a Follow Through Girl with the intention of making change in life. I did not realize the true significance in it. Because I had never embarked on such a journey, I could not grasp the power I held to effect to my own change.

Over the past 48 days I have: grown more confident, become stronger, said goodbye life long hypertension, come to terms with giving up cigarettes, obtained employment and given myself a sense of pride never before felt.

As I move along through these changes I began to question whether my largest goal is large enough. 13.1 miles is not as far away as it seemed in the beginning. The distance has not changed. 13.1 is 13.1. It's the vehicle that has changed.

I waited so long to come forward with my decision because I needed to be certain I was on the right path. I needed the Idea Girl to stop being the one who always wins. The one who gets in my way of completion. I needed to be sure I was doing this for myself and not instant gratification. In finally realizing I was the only one who's opinion mattered in the choices I make for my life, I have inadvertently grown more positive opinions from others.

Yesterday my cousin sat next to me, big smile on his face. "I'm really proud of you and excited for your 1/2 marathon. It's on my 19th birthday and we're all coming to see you finish". My heart filled up immediately. To have someone, like him, realizing what this means to me and being there to offer support was totally unexpected and wonderful. Imagine spending your 19th birthday supporting your 30-something year old cousin. Selfless.

So today I'm going to give it even more than I thought I had. I'm going to push harder knowing in the end I hold more power than I can imagine. Locked doors will not stop me because the key is in my hand. I'll do it for myself, the Follow Through Girl, and I'll do it to inspire him the way he has inspired me.

Day 46: 1.5 Down and a Week to Prepare

Good news: I got a job! One with a lot of potential too. So/so news: I have one week to get myself together before it starts. I have a feeling all this change is going be more difficult with a work schedule. So for the next week I've got to focus on my sleeping patterns. No more staying until or past midnight. No more sleeping until seven. I've got to be more strict with my workouts and try to get them in at the same time each day. Most importantly, I've got to be prepared that at first I'm going to be tired after work and still get myself into the gym.

Some more good news: Lost another 1.5 lbs. Goodbye and so long...never want to see you again.

Worked some more with the free weights today after a mile warm up on the treadmill. Not supposed to walk today (according to my schedule) but I may go back this afternoon. Starting to freak out a bit because my new job requires "tucked in shirt". Ah, the nightmare of chubby girls everywhere!

Day 46

My postings have become less and less. This is one I habit necessary to break. If I'm not posting, I'm not following through 100%.

Spent the last few days in a lot of pain. Tried to accomplish my daily goal yesterday but had to stop after just one mile and was in near tears. Today was much, much better. Got my mileage in along with some strength training.

It is definitely time to amp up the strength training! Got the courage up to make better use of the free weights since the universal gym is sketchy at best. I'm beginning to notice that parts of me that were plump with excess fat are now jiggly. Jiggly = no good. Got to get a handle on that best I can.

Another walk along the river planned for this afternoon. The sun is supposed to come later so I shouldn't come home a drown rat this time.

Day 43

Walked in the pouring rain last night. When I was finished I was drenched through my coat, sweatshirt and t-shirt. Once you're wet you're wet so I decided to keep moving. End result: freezing cold but accomplished goal. Getting easier all the time!

Had a second job interview today with my favorite coffee company. Since I don't want to plug them I'll just say it starts with an "S" and ends in a "arbucks". Went very well. I think I would be a great addition to their team and they a great addition to my life. We'll see by Friday.

Need to get into the gym tonight. Just waiting for...actually I don't know what I'm waiting for. I think my adrenalin to go down a bit. Got so excited about the possible new endeavor it's been like I'm high ever since I left the interview.

I did notice more confidence than ever going into it. No more feeling inadequate because of my weight. I know this body will not be mine forever and frankly so impressed with my improvements I feel like I can conquer anything.